Caves and Duvets

Wednesday 22nd November

 Today we went to see cave, and cave was actually really really good – I was plesently surprised. We were also taken around some Zen garden and shown some Chineese artwork – very interesting if you are into art. If I told you we went to see how duvets were made would you laugh? I give you permission to laugh. But these were silk duvets – my friend bought one but I was not prepared to backpack around the world with a silk duvet in my back pocket – so happily gave it a miss. Onwards and upwards as we journeyed to our next destination – panda land. DELAYED DELAYED DELAYED – Our plane to Pandaland was delayed – they said due to adverse weather conditions but I think it was due to big Olympic Panda escaping from the Panda centre and found trying to board the plane to Alice Springs in need of some hot sunshine but he had taken a nail file with him in his hand luggage and they were worried he was going to do some dammage to fellow passengers. We did finally arrive in Pandaland an hour or so later, to meet our guide also called “Helen”. Thank goodness she did have an off switch, she wasn’t in a Panda suit either. Hotel is standard Hotel – very much like the other one really but with harder beds but the broadband (which is not wireless but at least its broadband) is better than the last hotel. Time for some sleep…

Fairytail Boats, cats tails and stuck records.

Tuesday 21st November

A 6.30 wake up call is quite a frighening thing when in mid sleep, that was all in the name of acruise down the Li River with our guide. We are currently in a posh hotel with breakfast, stocked up on fruit and cereal and pinched a couple of bananas and bready things for mid morning snacks – well you pay for these things so why not. Our “guide” didn’t seem to have an off button else it was broken for she would not shut up and told us 1001 times we were going on a boat. After about 5 minutes I learned to switch off myself and enjoy the scenary. Our boat trip was lovely though reminicient of New Zealands’ Milford Sound for the vast amounts of tourists and boats setting off downstream, a little too touristy but well worth it as there is no other way of seeing this area. Green tea welcomed us on board – I bet you didn’t know that green tea could talk and welcome english people did you? Well it can, just as records (anhttp://www.flickr.com/photos/purplespace/308231424/d tour guides) can become stuck and repeat themselves over and over and over again. The scenary was stunning – the mountains rising above like a bed of needles I’ve never seen anything so different. Magically the low cloud hung onto the mountains making it look like we were sailing through a fairytail. Lunch on board did consist of dead things like turtle, snake probably dog and cat (we saw a cat the previous night being dragged by its owner so that must have been today’s lunch) – so sticking to rice and vegetables is always a safer option. The tofu was quite nice though. Off the cruise trip….Umberella, you want to buy umbrella, despite having a decent waterproof over me ok it was raining but no i did not want a bloody umbrellla neither did I want a plastic flower despite how “beautiful” it was, and the guide was still doing her impression of a stuck record, a very very good one it was too. You buy scarf, you buy t shirt, you buy postcard, no no no…me buy mechanism to shut up guide thats what me buys. But even here in China they don’t seem to sell that, (though they sell everything else dammit) Stuck record guide then drove us around to a perl place – i don’t do perls but of course was polite and nodded in a “yes I look interested” sort of bored way, “you sell tea” i should have said, “I need tea” a good cuppa at that, just nice tea, tea tea, I am now thinking of tea. But alas no we were off again to some elephant place – now the chineese seem to think that an archway in the cliffs looks like an elephant dipping its nose into water, whereas everyone else calls it a cove or something similar, so they had made this area to view this elephant which was actually a cove, confused, yeah so was I especially as it was bucketing it down with rain, “You want to eat dead snake’s eyes, tortose brains on a stick, or snakes feet on a stick – just a minute snakes feet?? Now I am confused and wet and want that cup of tea. Guide had a friend who sold DVD’s so we did the DVD experience which I found interesting, they have all the proper DVD’s in the shop itself then cardboard boxes all the illegal ones, for the equilivant of less than 50p. So officially a bargain or what? That’s naughty very naughty, bad evil naughty, bad. Finally at around 4pm I get my cup of tea, back at the hotel room and try the luxury strawberry tim tams that my friend had bought me from oz now a girl sometimes needs her comforts and for me a cup of standard english breakfast tea with milk is one of them. Now I am happy. Keeping on the same theme we went into the more western cafe for some tea, before heading off to the theatre to see a performance of dance – performing local traditions. It was really interesting given that I am not really into Theatre. Really colourful, educational and very very clever in parts. A good ending to a day of failing to switch off the tour guide. I have been informed that tomorrow we are going to see a cave, I have been informed that tomorrow we are going to see a cave…. guess what? We are goin to see a cave tomorrow…. Over and out…

Cabin Cabbage and Tea Ceromonies

Monday 20th November 2006

Left Beijing today to meet my Ozzy friend to fly south to Guilin (and you thought I was going to say Oz didn’t you?) – the journey to the airport was 100 times worse than trying to get to Heathrow on a Monday morning with a tube strike on but with the added bonus of pollution smog and fog mixed into a leathal concoction. I suggest that you do not try this drink at home. The flight to South China smelt of cabbage, not only cabbage but rotton cabbage and the food wasn’t much better. Although I do like getting into the culture of things I was not too keen on rice and vegetables for breakfast so gave that a miss, good olde cereal bars came in handy that morning. I am now travelling with my Ozzy friend for a week, we are staying in hotels (she isn’t a hostel type person) so here’s to my week of “luxury”. We were picked up by our guide at Guilin airport, first impressions she seemed nice enough, very chatty and started telling us about the history of Guilin. Felt a bit strange being picked up at airport and shuffled into a private car, rather than navigating your own way to the accomodation. A bit of luxury as I said but at the same time I felt like I had lost control over things a little already. Make the most of it I thought as I’ll be back to public transport next week. During our journey to the hotel we got free history and geography lessons, I enjoyed the geography lessons more – all about the formation of the landscape – which was very magical, enclosed rolling montrosoties rising up everywhere. There was no homework tonight. Hotel was posh for my standards, – consiergue and all that sort of thing. It’s all nice though I get a slight feeling I could be anywhere in the world. We opted for a tour up a mountain via cable car for the rest of the afternoon – up Mountain Yao – Yao, i said yao, yao. To get to the top of Yao we could either fly or take the cable car, my friend can not swim or fly so we took the cable car instead. The view at the top was undescribable – pinnacles rising from the earths surface all around us as we walked above the clouds. Our geography lesson was repated again (and again) once we got back into the car, It was a bit like flicking through the EPG only to find that there is nothing on the tv apart from repeats of Blackadder or Keeping Up Appearances. We weren’t even to be examined on this so I am not sure why the repeats. Tea tea tea tea, if you know me well you know I like tea. So when asked if we wanted to vist a tea plantation I was like er “no I really can’t be bothered”. Of course we visited the tea plantation. Learning about the different sorts of teas was fascinating enough but there was more to come as we were welcomed into a tea cerromony, shown how to drink tea chineese style and tried 5 different teas. Tea tea tea and tea. I was tea’d out by the end of it, but still wanted more tea. The night market that evening was intreguing. I expected something like the markets in Beijing but a bit disapointed due to the amount of of tack tack and more tack. Tacker than tat tat tat. So we bought more tea from a little tea shop. Long day meant time for bed.